SAMA HOOLE: Week 26: "Pricing up half a cow and a chest freezer." Week 30: "Considering whether the garden could support a heifer." Week 36: "Naming the heifer."

The label reading evolution:

Week 1: "I'll cut sunflower oil from the cupboard. Done."

Week 2: "Why is rapeseed oil in the bread."

Week 3: "Why is sunflower oil in the hummus."

Week 4: "Why is canola oil in the pesto."

Week 6: "The shop is now taking ninety minutes."

Week… pic.twitter.com/5pWkHYZw3G

— Sama Hoole (@SamaHoole) June 11, 2026

The label reading evolution: Week 1: "I'll cut sunflower oil from the cupboard. Done." Week 2: "Why is rapeseed oil in the bread." Week 3: "Why is sunflower oil in the hummus." Week 4: "Why is canola oil in the pesto." Week 6: "The shop is now taking ninety minutes." Week 8: "There's seed oil in the tinned tomatoes." Week 10: "The 'olive oil mayonnaise' is 96% rapeseed." Week 14: "Asking waiters what they fry the chips in. Nobody knows." Week 18: "Bringing a small bottle of tallow to dinner parties." Week 22: "Rendering my own dripping on a Sunday." Week 26: "Pricing up half a cow and a chest freezer." Week 30: "Considering whether the garden could support a heifer." Week 36: "Naming the heifer."

The descent into paranoia is just pattern recognition arriving in real time.